It was a warm May day in 2017. It was a day that I’ll never forget. It was my second day in the Philippines. I had just moved into a condo in Las Pinas (a suburb of Manila). I had gotten settled in and was laying in my bed, bored.
Being bored I did what most gay men do; I went on Grindr. Not looking for anything, in particular, I was just playing around on the app when a nice young man messaged me. We chatted on the app and then we talked on the phone.
We began to talk…
Before I knew it we had been talking for almost two hours!
He told me he was separated from his wife and was looking to explore his sexuality. He made it clear he wasn’t looking for a ‘hold hands in public’ type of relationship.
That was perfectly fine with me as I wasn’t ready to get serious with anyone anyway.
After talking for quite a while he asked to visit me. We went over what we would do and what the boundaries were yadda yadda standard hookup procedure.
He arrived at my condo building gate and I said let’s get a soda first since I was thirsty. We were walking and talking and then he just stopped.
He looked at me and said
“I didn’t know you were fat. I think I’m going to pass”
Time just stopped….
I was so humiliated!
It wasn’t just that he rejected me it was the way that he rejected me that hurt so much. He might as well have pierced a knife into my heart that’s how bad it felt.
Angry and humiliated I was so ready to attack him.
I think he sensed that because he stuck out his hand to shake mine. I was still ready to punch some respect into him but I decided that wouldn’t be a good start to my new life in the Philippines.
I shook his hand and we parted ways.
When I walked into my condo it took everything I had to prevent myself from crying like a little girl…
Afterwards, he sent me a text thanking me for me time to which I didn’t reply. That night I told myself something that has stuck with me.
I WILL NEVER BE REJECTED ON GRINDR LIKE THAT AGAIN!
I’ve always been a realistic person and never afraid to face the truth. I knew there were two main things going against me on Grindr or any gay dating app in the Philippines.
My dark skin is beautiful to me so I wasn’t going to do anything to change that but I sure as hell could lose weight! After researching I found an article that talks about how to get a decent gay man. It said losing weight would, amongst other things, help my dating woes
I Came Up With A Plan
After researching many diet plans I figured all these plans work if you stick to them. The key is to find something you could stick to! I decided that Keto was the right diet for me.
Why? This is why!
With Keto you get to eat lots of steak and dairy! Picked up a keto beginners guide and it told me to use a keto calculator to measure how many calories and carbs I should eat. I have made a Macros Calculator that you can use it has a beautiful interface it asks simple questions and it tells you how many carbs, fats, protein, and calories to eat. The best part is it’s free with no email required!
My First Keto Diet Experience Was Bad!
I wish I could say everything went honkey dory from there but sadly it didn’t. Resisting staple foods such as bread, potatoes, and rice proved to be a lot more difficult than I expected. Also, I felt like it took forever to get into ketosis! For me, it took 2 weeks to enter ketosis which may as well have been forever! What’s worse is if you cheat whilst on Keto, you lose about a week’s worth of progress!
After the two week mark, I got the Keto flu which for me was just feeling really tired and just out of it and I began dwelling about bad things in the past that happened to me. Those 12 words “I didn’t know you were fat I think I’m going to pass” kept playing in my head for about a day and a half. I quit after 16 days and ate a large pizza by myself. I felt pretty bad about it, to be honest.
I may have been down but I was far from out! This time I decided to jump on the Keto train again. After some soul searching I discovered if I could just get into ketosis faster the weight loss would motivate me to keep going! I decided to try Purefit Keto which is a natural supplement that helps put you into ketosis faster. It reduced my appetite and increased my energy. It’s also worth noting that I didn’t have a keto flu this time.
Second Time’s A Charm!
My grindr profile reflects the change!
I’d be lying if I said I never got rejected on grindr again but let me tell you losing weight made my dating life better than its ever been before! Seriously, despite (proudly) still having very dark skin I went from being ignored to having an inbox full of messages every time I opened my grindr app! I also got my skin to clear up!
How I did it:
- I only drank water and milk at home and a small diet soda when I went out. Milk is important because it prevents your body from absorbing fat.
- My favorite breakfast was keto egg muffins with sausage and cheese
- For my recipes, I used free recipes from the 28-day keto challenge. When I got tired of those I used Green Chef.
- Lunch would be protein heavy for example chicken breast with cauliflower rice and keto brownies
- Dinner also protein rich for example a chicken soup or lento beans and beef
Why Do The Keto Diet?
Keto was the right choice for me. I love cheese, meat, and vegetables so I didn’t mind the restrictive nature of the diet once I got into ketosis. That being said it’s certainly not for everyone and it’s not the only diet that works out there. If you’re thinking about Keto I put together this quiz to help you see if Keto is right for you. Let me say right off the bat if you have kidney or liver problems I would consult a physician before trying Keto.
Keto Mental Clarity
Once I was in ketosis the second time I began to notice a sharp increase in mental clarity. I have ADHD but I began to have a much easier time remembering things. I didn’t lose my keys anymore, for example. I also was able to think more quickly on my feet.
I remember when I was in a debate with someone and he asked me if I knew which two presidents have ever been impeached and without even thinking I said “Andrew Johnson and Bill Clinton”. It was a ‘woah!” moment! Plus the guy shut up.
My skin cleared up
Before keto, I used to have problems with acne and abscesses. My immune system must have gotten stronger because now my skin is as soft and clear as a baby’s bottom.
How to Save Money While on Keto
While on keto you’ll probably spend more on food than before–remember you’re replacing cheap carbs with expensive meats and cheeses. How much more depends on you. I was able to save by getting a large amount of my protein from cheap eggs rather than expensive meat. I also saved a ton by not buying sweetened drinks.
Another way to save money is to have low carb meals delivered to you. This is a great way to experiment and see what you like and don’t like. There are some really delicious low carb options my favorite low carb meal is keto nachos! It’s fried chicken strips with white kidney beans, meat, guacamole, and pico de gallo
Nachos are allowed in the Keto diet! And yes there’s real meat, real cheese, real sour cream, and real guacamole not that low fat fake diet crap!
For snacks, you can get a plethora of free snacks ideas online. Forkley.com has a ton of free great keto snack ideas. My favorite keto snacks are:
- Pork Rinds
- Cheese Crisps
- Fudge Fat Bombs
- Cream Cheese Cookies
- Keto Pigs in a Blanket
If you are busy *cough* lazy *cough* like me then you can also get keto snacks delivered to your door. Those snacks are likely to be perfectly measured to make sure you’re still within your macronutrient requirements.
If you want to lose weight then keto is the best way to quickly lose weight without feeling hungry. It worked for me and 10s of thousands of others who have tried it. You have nothing to lose but your weight! I want to be able to gloat about my own grit but the truth is the supplements are what helped me to go into ketosis much faster and thus keep me motivated to lose weight and stick to this plan!
Oh, it’s also worth mentioning that the jeepney drivers don’t charge me double anymore either! LOL!